Bullet Train is a big, dumb movie. So many critics and cinema-goers slated it because of that fact. Here’s the thing: it knows that it’s a big, dumb movie and that’s entirely the point. So it doesn’t have an all-encompassing moral message like a Pixar movie would, and to that I say ‘so what?’ Remember when a movie could just be entertaining and not insightful or profound? Apparently some people have forgotten that some films can just be in the former camp rather than the latter.
Put simply, Bullet Train is an action comedy flick in which Brad Pitt plays an unlucky assassin that goes by the name of Ladybug. It is based on a Japanese novel named Maria Beetle and was previously adapted for the big screen into a film called Grasshopper; a Japanese language revenge thriller. This adaptation opts to take a more light-hearted approach, in which Ladybug boards a train from Tokyo with one specific task at hand. However, when Ladybug comes across a whole bunch of other assassins on the train, his simple goal becomes all the more complicated.
Seems like I enjoyed this movie a lot more than most. How can you not? It’s just so much fun! Thankfully, I’m blessed with the ability to just enjoy a movie for what it is, and not what it’s not…
In all honesty, I forgot that I hadn’t reviewed this yet (I actually watched it a week beforehand) because I had so many thoughts after it finished that I was sure I’d already written them all down. It’s difficult to even know where to begin, but I’ll just summarise my thoughts simply once again for the people at the back: sometimes films don’t have to be full of deep, meaningful messaging. Sometimes films can just be entertaining. And this is absolutely the latter.
I won’t say that I’m Brad Pitt’s biggest fan. Do I like some of his movies? Sure (Fight Club, Inglorious Basterds) – and this one is no different. Could you replace him in this movie with a whole slew of other, just as capable actors, not least an Asian one? Absolutely. Even so, he does well enough that I didn’t even think twice about it until afterwards. The stand out for me though was actually Japanese native Hiroyuki Sanada, who brought a very good dramatic performance to a character who ended up being the most intriguing.
Yes, there are some issues, specifically with how messy and convoluted the story gets. However, that’s kind of what makes it so fun; just when you think nothing else can go wrong, it gets a whole lot worse. Not only that, but visually there’s a lot of inventive camerawork that makes you yell “how did they do that?!” and that’s exactly what I want from an action movie.
Clearly Bullet Train is not good enough to be an Oscar nominee, nor is it a piece of artsy, finely-crafted filmmaking, but it may be the most fun I’ve had watching a movie all year, and I just can’t hate it for that.
Bullet Train is currently available to stream on Sky Cinema and Now TV in the UK.
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